Fort Cochin

One early morning train from Kannur to Ernaukulam (in Kochi and the busy transport hub of Kerala). Tick. One auto journey from Ernaukulam train station to Fort Cochin (the area we wanted to stay). Tick. Clean budget accommodation. Hmmmmm.

Our auto driver was pretty patient and after our first choice of homestay (a term that is also seemingly loosely used for guesthouses as not all provide food) in the guidebook was full he drove around for a little while longer in order to help us find a room in our price range. It seemed that the guesthouses in Fort Cochin were at least twice what we would want to pay. The village did seem like a smart area, it has a colonial past resulting in a blend of Portugal, Holland and England, and sits on the Malabar Coast. The driver kept saying that this area was very expensive so seeing as we were tired, hot, thirsty and hungry and we needed to think about Plan B we paid him, got out and walked to a cafe. Yet again, as we have found in Kerala so far, the village of Fort Cochin was quite civilised and clean. We stopped in a trendy art cafe for some tomato soup and a cheese toastie followed by a tasty chocolate thing with some coffee. Nice. Whilst pondering what to do next, Matt and I talked to a couple of people about where to stay and found that there were a few places to stay that were well within our budget and were within walking distance. While I waited with our bags in the first possibility, Matt went for a wander in the afternoon heat and found a much better one well within our price range. Great.
We checked in, had showers, and went for dinner at a place nearby for some Italian food which was pretty tasty and made a change. The next morning after breakfast in a cafe (which was expensive and crap) we set off to the tip of Fort Cochin which was lined with stalls selling fresh fish and shellfish of all kinds, and beyond them, a sting of giant cantilevered Chinese fishing nets.



These spiderlike mechanisms were created by traders from the court of Kubla Khan in the 1400’s and require at least four men to operate the counterweights. We watched on as an organised group of tourists were shown how to use them and to be honest, they seem like more hassle than they are worth for the amount and size of fish they catch with them in the depleted waters these days!


They are obviously using more profitable modern fishing techniques these days for the sizeable ones, but it seemed like the locals were still using the Chinese nets to catch small fish for their own consumption while the big expensive fish were on sale for foreigners. It seemed strange that they were trying to sell fish to tourists, the majority of which are evidently staying in hotels and didn’t have a kitchen, but it turned out that you could buy your fish in the morning and then go to one of the associated cafes and have it cooked and served for a cost in the evening. This seemed like a good idea and we did contemplate it for a while, but after seeing the seemingly unclean state of the cafes we decided against it.

We went for a walk along the water’s edge to see what more there was. Fort Cochin is on the tip of the southern peninsula that makes up a part of the group of islands and peninsulas that is Kochi. Ernaukulam, where we got off the train, is on the mainland and modes of transport here include small and frequent ferries across the water to places such as Fort Cochin. On our walk we spotted some Dolphins really close in which was a nice surprise, and I met some friendly Indian girls from the Convent (it’s a Catholic area) that were out for the day.

Looking at this picture, I am not sure if the one is pink is actually a girl.... but I like the little one with glasses (I have a soft spot for fellow four-eyes of the miniature variety).

We got the obligatory sunset photos of the fishing nets...



We took more but we won’t bore you with all the different angles and light that we (or namely I) thought the nets looked good in as it is really a bit dull. The beauty and curse of digital cameras.

As well as the ritual art of Theyyam that we saw in Kannur, Kerala has some traditional arts which it likes to boast about. Kalarippayat is an ancient tradition of martial training and discipline, some saying that it is the predecessor of all martial arts and can be traced back to the 12th century. The low key performance in the arts centre we went to started by short explanations in English (with a rolling Kerala accent which we found hard to understand) followed by the display of the basic movements used.

The show seemed a bit slow at first but it was really impressive when they put them together for a ‘fight’, especially seeing as it was all done on a bare concrete floor. The boys on stage were young and very skilled. They even used sticks (which they spun at an incredible speed), swords (that sparked loudly and brightly every time the steel of the swords touched, from pure force) and a dangerous looking metal whip. It had two 3 inch wide lengths of metal edged with razor teeth that looked horrific and actually ended up caused some damage, during the performance, to their feet! Hazard of the business I guess.
The stars of the show

It was interesting and good to see something other than dance and music. Those boys would make really good fire throwers, we have yet to see anyone who can handle a stick like they could!

As we weren’t too interested in visiting churches or cemeteries, and the backwater tours organised from Fort Cochin were more expensive than further south, there wasn’t much else for us to do here. Before we left however, we took the 4 rupee ferry across to mainland Ernaukulam and bought some gifts for Matt’s nieces from this mother and daughter.

They two may not look like a hard bargain, but buying these bracelets from them involved the usual sign language and pigeon-English, and contribution from passers-by, including a comment from a disgruntled Indian who claimed that we shouldn’t be bargaining with these poor homeless people even though we all knew they were asking for way more than they were worth!

Whilst Matt was bargaining, the daughter had taken my hand and stamped it all over with some patterned blocks covered in henna-type ink (that turned out to be quite permanent and took over a week to scrub off) and tried to charge me 100 rupees for the pleasure.

She was obviously unhappy with the 10 rupees that I offered and even had the cheek to return it to me. She took it in the end though, and our little exchange ended with smiles, but these two were not quite the little cherubs we first thought they might be!

We headed back to the ferry and had a chai and a few very cheap 5 rupee nimbu panis (a refreshing lemon juice, traditionally with some sugar and a little salt to replace lost minerals in sweat and a drink that we have come to love and drink a lot) at the stalls near the jetty.

Before leaving Fort Cochin, I decided to treat myself to a long awaited traditional Keralan Ayurvedic massage (all the oils used in Ayurveda are grown in and fill the fields of Kerala) followed by a Sirodhara (the pouring of ?litres of ayurvedic oil of the forehead to release tension?). After a bit of exploring I found a little place called Evergreen that charged half the price of the fancier place and had a lovely calm atmosphere. I made an appointment with the female owner and it turned out to be the best massage I have had in a long time. I was already so relaxed by the time the massage was over but I was then to have oil poured on my head for 45 minutes. The initial sensation was strange. It made my whole head itchy as it stimulated the nerve endings in my scalp, but once that decreased it was most soothing and turned my body to jelly. I felt like I was plastered to the bed! It took me a while to recover myself, get off the bed and slowly wobble over to the shower where I was instructed to wash myself clean. Highly recommended.

On the whole, we thought Fort Cochin was quiet and pretty but maybe lacking in life and character. I think it is geared mostly towards package holiday makers as there are some beautiful heritage hotels and restaurants around and the area was generally a bit pricey. It was very difficult to find any proper local places to eat nearby (the main village is small), and even getting a cheap breakfast was tricky. We mainly ended up in the hotels or cafes for some relatively costly, but decent grub and that was ok. We did find their alcohol rules a bit odd though – there were very few places that sold beer legally, and places that didn’t have a licence sold it in teapots, sometimes, and definitely not on the first Saturday of the month for some reason or the other.

Next on the agenda was Alleppey. This was for the much talked about boat trip, in the backwaters of Kerala, and a highlight not to be missed apparently.

Sun, Sand and Strangeness

We headed down to the bus station early morning (well around 7.30) to get some grub at the tasty dosa place we had eaten in the day previous. After the preceding day’s bus confusion we were certain that we would be on our way today as this bus actually started its journey in Mysore. So we waited, and waited and waited some more. For some reason that we cannot fathom the bus was actually late! Maybe the driver was busy drinking chai and smoking beedies. Anyway, we jumped on and wedged ourselves into a seat along with our bags. The journey from Mysore to Kannur itself was generally picturesque, and we passed through some interesting areas. One such area was a huge TATA coffee plantation, where all the plants were in flower which filled our nostrils with a heavenly scent. The latter part of the journey was probably the bumpiest bus journey you would ever want or not want to take. It was quite entertaining to be honest and we held tight for a good couple of hours as the bus veered, swerved and tilted its way round and down from the hills to the coast.
We had a rough idea what we wanted to do in Kannur (lie on a beach, relax and also see a traditional ritual called Theyyam), but we were not sure of our options so we headed straight for the tourist information office. They were very helpful and talked us through the areas that we could stay and the things we could do. Ken (our Japanese friend) had told us of a beach at Adikadalayi, so when the tourist guy told us of KK Heritage which was based right by the beach there, we said that we would give it a go. Shriranj, the owner of KK Heritage, came to pick us up. We had a little laugh on the way as he sarcastically referred to the bus route we had taken as a “lovely bus ride”.
The places to stay here are set up as home stays. In this instance, a home stay meant that accommodation and food were included within the daily price. There is another home stay on the same beach which is better known (it's in the guide book), called Costa Malabari, but it is extremely expensive and its location is pretty damn poor in comparison. We were well pleased to have a much better location, closer to the beach and our own little chalet with an outside sitting area for half the price of the Costa place. For anyone looking to go to Kannur, do not pre book anything. We heard that when booking the Costa they make you commit to booking and pre paying for three days which is a con to say the least!! Anyway, we had a warm welcome and great surroundings.

We headed straight for the beach of course.


We spent about a week in Kannur. Our main reason for coming was to see the Theyyam and we planned on seeing a few, but for a couple of reasons things stalled a little and we only managed to see one (there are around 450 different types of Theyyam) and chill on the beach.

The Theyyam is a ritualistic art form that is said to pre-date Hinduism. It is basically a religious trance like performance carried out by an individual who has prepared for the ritual with a period of fasting, abstinence and meditation. The individual also goes through a lengthy make up and costume session in order to look the part (the part being that of a deity). During the performance the performer goes into a trance and takes the form of the chosen deity. He basically becomes possessed. The devotees at the Theyyam are then blessed by the erm....’god’. Instead of trying to explain the full, factual ups and downs of it all, I shall just talk you through what we witnessed.
We arrived at the costume and make up stage of the ritual. We watched as the guy, with the aid of another man, painted himself in the necessary colours of the chosen deity....

...put on the necessary head gear of the chosen deity....

And then the final touches that result in him looking like some sort of cartoon character (seeing those big white lip things move when he talked is quite comical).

Once he is all kitted (or Godded) out the drums begin to bang (very, very loudly) and the ceremony begins......

It’s difficult really to describe what happens without actually being there. It involves lots of dancing around and LOTS OF LOUD DRUMMING which creates quite an atmosphere as it builds and builds. You could perhaps understand that if a deity were to manifest itself in human form this might be the environment in which it would choose to do so. It gets quite intense (and did I mention LOUD?!).

This all last about 15 or 20 minutes, with lots of twirling around, water and rice scattering and all the other stuff that goes along with this kind of thing like: lots of burning oil lamps, a sword that did the rounds with a twirling dancing man (who seemed to manage to prance around the place with his eyes closed without knocking into a single thing), coconuts, (they use coconut in everything here), banana leaves, toddy (alcohol made from coconuts) etc, etc. During the ceremony the men devotees are given offerings and there seemed to be a growing queue of women to one side, some with children.

They all waited patiently until the twirling, prancing and drum banging had finished and the deity sat in the middle of the area. After the men had got yet another offering the women then got to address the deity and get a blessing.
As the deity sat on the chair, each woman would talk briefly (maybe ask for a good son in law or whatever) to the deity and then he would bless them, his language and words pouring from his mouth in an unbelievable quick fashion.

The Theyyam is yet another interesting and quite fanciful religious ceremony to witness. I’m going to refrain from giving my full personal view on this type of ceremony out of respect, but I do and have found it interesting to see what other men on earth believe in.

As mentioned previously, we didn’t really get up to much here. One early morning we ventured out into the lagoon behind the home stay for a little bird watching which was pleasant enough.


The remainder of our time was spent on the beach or relaxing in our chalet. The beach itself was very quite indeed and it’s a great place to unwind. The food we were served by Shriranj was fantastic and Dipi got some recipes off him so she can cook up a south Indian storm sometime.

Oil be damned

Our main reason for heading to Bangalore was to see my cousin Neha who is at College there. We were planning to meet in the afternoon of the day we arrived, stay one night and leave the following day for Mysore.

Our overnight bus journey was relatively painless and on being dumped on the side of a busy road, we forced ourselves awake and ready for the next challenge; finding an auto driver to take us to the centre of the city for a fair price. And that’s when we realised that they spoke little English or Hindi (they speak Kanada). It was the first time since being in India that we had found that we couldn’t verbally communicate with the locals which made bargaining for an auto journey at 6 am all the more fun.

We eventually agreed on a price with a driver and got in only to realise that he didn’t really know where he was going. After some help with our guidebook map and a ten minute drive he tried to insinuate that the road we wanted was one way so we would have to get down earlier and walk the rest. We refused but seeing as he had decided to stop we decided to get out and gave him less money than he asked for as it blatantly wasn’t a one way road! He got angry at us (!!) but we ignored him and set off down the road for another 10 minutes, with our packs, till we got to the guesthouse we were looking for. Seeing as we wanted to be in the city close to where we were going to meet Neha, we could only get something very basic for our budget. We were hungry, so once we checked in the room boy went and got us breakfast in the form of a tasty Masala Dosas. We were pretty tired after our journey so we crashed out for a couple of hours and then went into town. Rebranded as Bangaluru in 2006, this IT boom town is best known as a centre for software and electronics development rather than as a tourist destination so most travellers rarely stop here long.

The walk from the guesthouse to the main shopping street, MG Road, was not a long way, so we didn’t see of the city, but from first impressions the centre seemed like a civilised enough place with some big shopping malls alongside coffee shops, bookshops and cafes. We hooked up with Neha just off the MG Road and headed for her favourite haunt for some food and beer, followed by coffee and cake at her favourite coffee house just down the road. It was really good to see her catch up with her news and we also got some help with places to go for things that we wanted to buy.

After polishing off some rather tasty treats at the coffee shop we said our goodbyes and headed back to our guesthouse for the night, waking early with the traffic the next morning. After a tasty South Indian breakfast at the restaurant across the road and a few hours looking for and using the internet (we thought that this being the IT centre there would be internet cafes on every street in the city but we only managed to find one in the whole area), we headed for the bus station for our bus to Mysore.

The bus itself was the smartest bus we have been on in India and our tickets even included a small complimentary bottle of water! The journey took a relatively short three hours (which is like a 5 minute jaunt in India) and we arrived before sunset. We grabbed an auto driver who took us to a different hotel to which we were planning on staying (the owner was his friend of course) but the Chandra Palace Hotel turned out to be a very comfortable place with a fat mattress and cable TV which suited us very well!

Mysore is famous for regal heritage, its silk, sandalwood, incense and essential oil production and is endorsing itself as an international centre for Ashtanga Yoga these days. We weren’t planning on doing any yoga but were thinking about seeing the Maharaja’s Palace and possibly a little shopping. We had a restful nights sleep and after some breakfast, we walked to the Palace. It wasn’t clear to see in the crowded streets near where we were staying, but as we walked closer to the wide streets near the Palace we noticed that Mysore was a very clean and tidy little city with some nice architecture. Lining the streets were fruit-wallas selling freshly cut papaya, mango, watermelon, jackfruit, pineapple, amoungst others, with or without masala. There were also wallas selling freshly pressed sugar cane juice, bhel puri and nuts so we stuffed our faces with all sorts on the way!

We got to the Palace and took a couple of snaps outside (no cameras allowed).

And went to buy our tickets (one cheap 10 ruppee local ticket and one expensive white person ticket please). The Palace was quite something. It was designed by an English architect called Henry Irwin and the present version (the older one burnt down in 1897) was completed in 1912 at a cost of 4.5 million Rupees (£60,000). As we walked through the interior we came upon room after outrageously ornately decorated room, with a kaleidoscopes of stained glass, mirrors, mosaic floors, carved wooden doors and historic paintings a plenty. Many portraying life in Mysore during the Edwardian Raj. Some may see it as gaudy but we thought it was awesome. The colours were fantastic and the work was detailed and flashy. The Palace itself was also very well managed with visitors having to follow a one way path laid out with ropes and it was well maintained and clean with visitor having to leave their shoes at the shoe walla. We were impressed. There was another section to see which included personal items of the maharajas of Mysore but they wanted to charge us the same price again to go in, which was too steep, so we decided against it and went and got a refreshing mango ice-cream instead!

After much deliberation about whether we could be arsed or not, we decided to go and visit the temple on the summit of Chamundi Hill (1062m) which overlooks Mysore. We flagged an auto to take us there. Our options included being driven to the bottom of the hill and walking up the 1000+ steps, or being driven up half way or all the way up. We decided on the healthy, bottom of the hill option which saved usa few rupees. On the way to the hill we stopped off to have a peek at the Queens Palace (given to her by her King we think) which has now been turned into the upmarket Lalita Mahal Palace Hotel.

On being dropped off at the bottom of Chamundi Hill we agreed on a time for our auto to be back, and started walking up as the pilgrims are supposed to. Matt was thrilled to be doing it.

We didn’t see many pilgrims and the walk wasn’t as hard as it is made out to be in the book, but it was pretty damn hot. Almost two thirds up the hill we stopped off at a sugar cane juice walla and for a hit of sugar (it is so sweet and Matt reckons the taset is identical plain boiled sweets. A bit chuppa chup like and of course incredibly sweet).


It looks like it takes a lot of power to press the sugar cane and they press the same bit over and over again till it’s dry, the silver pot on the side collects the juice (you see these all over India).

Before we reached the top there is 5m high Nandi (Shiva’s bull vehicle), carved out of solid rock in 1659, which pilgrims also visit. Matt was given his blessing first (tikka and string around his wrist) first, and then me. We gave our donation and started walking out but he scorned at us and demanded a whole lot more! So we left. Cheeky bloody sadhu.

It wasn’t long before we were at the top and to be honest, we were a bit disappointed as the view at the top wasn’t pretty, we couldn’t get a view because of the building work and there were tarmac roads surrounding the so-so temple. Not very special we thought but we sat for a while and people watched, which was funny.....

And they watched (stared) us (love the hats cool dudes)

The cows were terrorising the worshippers who were armed with coconut and sweets for the gods! The cows here do eat anything, including cardboard.

After walking down we got back into our auto and headed for the essential oil ‘doctor’ (someone the autodriver had mentioned previously) who was open to sell essential oils only on one day of the month and we were so lucky because that day just happened to be today. Sure we believe you. We did end up testing some smells and buying some oil and came out smelling like a perfume factory.


We saw on the way a cow that had been painted yellow....

..which briefly distracted us from the thought that we probably spent more than we should have, but what to do.

We headed back to the hotel, stopping for some grub on the way, for a cosy night in. We were planning on leaving the next afternoon after visiting the local market. We got up the next morning and packed our bags ready for the journey later in the day and walked to the market.

Within minutes of entering a young boy started talking to us and I bought a small garland of fragrant jasmine flowers from him. He said he sold oils too so as we were interested to see what he had to offer (obviously the yarn we were spun the previous day about oils only being sold on one day a month was complete rubbish, surprise surprise). As we walked we saw lots and lots more garlands and boxes and buckets of colourful little flowers that smelt gorgeous.


Betel nut for chewing with conical piles of red and yellow tikka powder at the back.

It turned out that we HAD paid over the odds for the oil that we had bought (grrr) and this guys price seemed to be much more reasonable. Shopkeepers and autos drivers like to show you books with paragraphs written by foreigners who have also bought from their shop or used the auto driver for sightseeing and this little shop wasn’t different. He had piles and piles of books, each book representing a different country, with photos and paragraphs and signatures of people who had spent their money at his shop but this time we met two foreigners who were returning for some more business and it made us feel better about trusting this boy so we spent some money.

We had a chai, autographed the English book and then left (stinking again this time of rose, jasmine, lotus and vanilla) to see what the rest of the market had to offer.

Palm Sugar for cooking


More beautiful flowers


Every kind of Indian vegetable you can think of

Metres and metres and metres

Some pretty tikka powder for you madam?

And lots of fruit


It was a nice little place but it was time to go so we headed back to the hotel with bags of yummy fresh fruit and our oils. We found out (from making lots of telephone calls to the bus station, asking the old dude sitting in reception, looking at our guide book and then finally a quick visit to the bus station) that there was a bus in the afternoon but we couldn’t find out how long it would take so we decided to risk it and go. We collected our bags and headed down to the station for a tasty masala dosa in preparation for our journey. Before I finished my lunch Matt went to check the bus time only to find out that it had been cancelled. So we ate up and headed back to the hotel for another night and decided to take the morning bus for Kannur instead.....